A Guide to Contentment
By Darla Shine, author of Happy Housewives
If mum isn’t happy, no one is. We have all heard this. It's hard to raise a contented baby if you are on the edge. Your baby can pick up on your emotions. When you are overwhelmed and exhausted, taking care of a colicky baby can be extremely frustrating. When the dirty bottles are piling up in the sink and the laundry basket is overflowing, you may feel like you are going to lose your mind. This is why many new mums feel like they have lost control of their lives.
No one warns you about this at the baby shower. No one tells you how lonely you will be as a new mum. How isolating it is. How hard it can be. Taking care of a sick baby is harder than meeting any business deadline, but who prepares us for this?
After I gave birth to my daughter I lost control. I was miserable and lonely. My house was a disaster. I felt like I had no identity. What had I turned into? I’ll tell you - I was a depressed and desperate mother, with no schedule and no routine. My house was a mess and so was I. I had a toddler, an infant, a husband, a dog and a house to look after, and I just couldn’t keep up. I walked around in my sweat pants looking like a dumpy house-frump with vomit stuck to my clothes. I was overweight and overwrought. Then one afternoon a pretty young mum with perfect blonde hair and a trendy outfit called me a fat slob. I decided then that I had to find a way to snap out of it. I got on a schedule. I got organized. I bought some new clothes and started to exercise. I had my hair cut. I stopped scraping the children’s leftovers into my mouth and I vowed to take on motherhood as if it were my new career, and damn if I didn’t do it great!
I started reading everything from raising genius kids to having great sex. I started cooking, got back in the sack, and I had a whole new attitude. I wrote a chart of ten steps to hang on my fridge and I would read it every day. I decided to get my kids and husband on board too. I listened to Gina Ford and got my baby in a routine. I started to pay attention to what my husband needed from me. And I decided my life was good after all. Being home with my babies was the chance of a lifetime. I let myself embrace my children and my home and I became truly happy.
Many of the mums I knew saw the difference in me, and asked me to help them too. So I would hand out copies of my ten steps that I had hanging on my fridge. After a while I decided I needed to turn my list into a book to help all the other desperate mums out there. My book Happy Housewives has helped thousands of mums all over the world realise that there is a way to be happy at home. It’s easy to do once you get into the routine. It all starts with a positive attitude and the determination to do better.
If you are feeling desperate, follow my ten-step programme, and you should soon find yourself feeling more content. In summary:
Step 1 - Please stop whining!
Step 2 - Be Proud! Being an at-home mum is the most important job.
Step 3 - Stop looking like a housewife.
Step 4 - Make your marriage a priority.
Step 5 - Bond with your home.
Step 6 - Get back in the kitchen.
Step 7 - Keep your girlfriends.
Step 8 - Make time for yourself.
Step 9 - Don’t take it all so seriously.
Step 10 - Don’t wish for someone else’s problems.
Hope this helps, but for more information please join me at www.happyhousewivesclub.com. |
